You can run, But you can't hide from THE BLOG

...And when all is said and done here, hopefully I can look back on it all and say that I actually learned something. Being put on a pedestal is scary enough thanks...I'm not afraid of your expectations, it the short drop and sudden stop that I am worried about. Truth be told, I don't understand what the hell your rules mean. No means yes. Yes means "I can but I don't really want to...". Percy Sledge said "Tell it like it is". Love that song. Your rules, our rules...their rules? THE rules state, and this is a direct citation; "Rule number one: Never say what you truly mean, unless what you truly mean has a hidden meaning all together, in which case the actual meaning is hidden behind what you really mean to say in the first place. And if you can't say what you actually mean in polite company, take a step back and really ponder the meaning behind the phrase 'polite company'. If by some chance your meaning of polite comapny differs from someone else's meaning, then the two of you should collaborate on discovering the true meaning of the phrase." That was actually only part of rule number one.
You can't push buttons, no one is willing to say anything to my face. No one really wants to tell me that I am crazy, or that i am a pathologically lying whore. But I can't imagine it being easier to lie to someone. Unless, of course, you are a pathological liar...which I am not. I was lying about that one. So what, is it a family legacy? Keeping secrets? Making sure that we don't share too much b/c what we could share can't actually be said in polite company. So we keep our mouth shut so the world doesn't have to know that their neighborhood is filled with pedophiles, or that Ted Bundy is the guest speaker at next weeks PTO meeting, where all the stay at home mom's discuss the new HOA tips (rules) on how to keep your lawn green (chemically induced green). So as long as your lawn in neatly kept, and your home looks acceptable on the outside, we'll kindly ignore the meth lab cooking on the indside subtely taking the place of delicious oatmeal cookies....the kinds of oatmeal cookies that June Cleaver won't bake anymore b/c they're not part of the South Beach Diet Plan. Ward and the Beave are blowing eachother in the garage, while Wally is taking scantily clad pictures of little girls in the basement. But at least their lawn is trimmed. Sooner or later, all the skeletons will come out of the closet. Thats all I'm sayin. And maybe we wouldn't have so fucking many skeletons in our closets if we just threw rule number one out of the window? (Personally, I don't think the rule makes any sense.) Seriously, I don;t need your helping hand. if your compassion were in the form of ham sandwhich, I would tell you to choke on it. I don't understand your euphemisms. I don't understand your ablity to overcomplicate things. My world isn't black and white, but I can distinguish between the two. I know you can too, you are just choosing not to. You are here for the same reason I am. WORL DOMINATION BWA HA HA HA HA HA! You know who you are, you know why I hate you. I wish you could get a fucking clue and look me in the eye. That is all i ask.
On a lighter note, I am currently listening to Lateralus by Tool. It is a very good song, and I think you should all listen to it. If yo don't want to, fine, just be warned that I might have to remove one or both of your thumbs for insubordination.

Black then white are all I see in my infancy.red and yellow then came to be, reaching out to me.lets me see.As below, so above and beyond, I imaginedrawn beyond the lines of reason.Push the envelope. Watch it bend.Over thinking, over analyzing separates the body from the mind.Withering my intuition, missing opportunities and I mustFeed my will to feel my moment drawing way outside the lines.Black then white are all I see in my infancy.red and yellow then came to be, reaching out to me.lets me see there is so much moreand beckons me to look through to these infinite possibilities.As below, so above and beyond, I imaginedrawn outside the lines of reason.Push the envelope. Watch it bend.Over thinking, over analyzing separates the body from the mind.Withering my intuition leaving all these opportunities behind.Feed my will to feel this moment urging me to cross the line.Reaching out to embrace the random.Reaching out to embrace whatever may come.I embrace my desire tofeel the rhythm, to feel connectedenough to step aside and weep like a widowto feel inspired, to fathom the power,to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain,to swing on the spiralof our divinity and still be a human.With my feet upon the ground I lose myselfbetween the sounds and open wide to suck it in.I feel it move across my skin.I'm reaching up and reaching out.I'm reaching for the random or what ever will bewilder me.And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been.We'll ride the spiral to the end and may just go where no one's been.Spiral out. Keep going...